all permeating hunger

invisible intelligence { sbfr 9 }

you’re not used to it. just being yourself. being seen. having that be okay. welcome. wanted.

you’re not used to being anything other than a construction informed by your focus on how you might be perceived and what that would mean.

the vision of a sex kitten you were toying with an hour ago — when nothing looked right or felt right or like it wanted anything to do with you at all — dissolves.

you emerge when you let go of trying and just feel it. all of it.

the grey. the melancholy. the longing. the frustration. the desire. the hunger the hunger the hunger persisting always. all consuming. no matter, the distraction. fruitless. you are the fruit.

nobody was ever allowed to see that. you had to starve. you had to earn it. how? you’re not sure because it always existed. and how can you earn something that is already yours? perhaps all you ever did was create more of it, from it. and perhaps that’s the point. the immersion in hunger.

whenever you decide on a point it dissolves.
the particle becomes a wave when you enter it.

the static point becomes an undulating experience is what i mean. a creative process. erotic. a feeling you let yourself into. that cavernous space between your legs. the feeling that saturates your being. the one that, when you let yourself breathe, really breathe, dissolves all separation.

the feeling is you.
you are it.

it always goes there, doesn’t it? between your legs.

not always. it can, if you want it to.

it goes everywhere. all at once. you. you enter the field of consciousness from which all life springs. all possibility exists on the edge of unfolding. what do you choose to see?

with eyes? maybe.

maybe you gaze at your finger. or an unfurling peony.

or, maybe, you fixate all your awareness on the sense of openness. you know, the one.

maybe seeing is about what’s invisible.

maybe vision emerges according to assumption.

maybe assumption rises from your spinal column. from the way you breathe. and open. and become saturated with the feeling. you know, the one.

it’s always in the way you breathe, isn’t it?

it is.

it is always in the way you breathe.

it is breath, delivering a message.

breath. erotic substrate.

breath. invisible intelligence, hunger, all-permeating.

breathe, feel, remember. there are messages for you here.