the feeling of nothing

is very something

I wrote this poem in the wake of Hurricane Helene, having no way to reach my beloved. For a couple weeks, I had been in North Caroline with C, who you all formerly knew as Luke. Thankfully, I drove back to Maryland the day before the storm knocked out all power and communication. I was able to speak to him briefly, to know he is safe, but the gym he recently poured his heart into opening there was hit hard by the storm. I’ve set up a gofundme to help with whatever expenses are incurred in this devastation. Please visit the page to donate if you are of heart and ability to help.

Help Rebuild Bodytribe

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Right now
no body around,
no messages on my phone
no calls incoming.
The airwaves are sleeping;
still, open. 
I enjoy and abhor the feeling. 
As I’ve said previously, I’d like
a bit of feedback. A bit of
noise. Graininess in my film.
A photo of me with
smeared lipstick and
hair stuck to my forehead
like it does when 
we’re in the thick of each other.
Lamps dimmed. 
Massive Attack on the stereo.
Unfinished Sympathy. 
More like unfinished symphony. 
Now, at least.
Cell towers down.
Yearning for memories,
if you know what I mean. 
A warm touch. 
Your breath on my neck 
before the hungry animal,
sweaty flesh, thunder and lightning
tearing through us.
A monster, crazy, beautiful,
rides the waves. Or
are they riding me?
I lose track;
in the aftermath comes clarity.
No, that’s a lie — it just
rhymes.
Truth is, it’s all a mystery. 
Undeveloped film,
plotlines thickening,
and the climax? Well,
it’s a myth, oceanic. 
Hard to see through it,
but see this:
You never have to peak.
Peer into the future.
Notice your life expanding… 

If this helped you feel something, maybe you’d like to share, subscribe, and/or throw me some change for coffee, and lipstick.