I miss the days when blogs were just… blogs. Web logs! Little glimpses into someone’s days. Here’s what’s happening. Here’s what I had for breakfast + a quick recipe. Here’s a cute photo of my cat. Here’s the workout I did. Here’s why my boyfriend is the best. Here’s a movie I’m loving. No pressure. Just a place to share the sometimes mundane, sometimes exciting. What I loved most about the golden days of blogging was that it was personal, like I was sitting at the kitchen table catching up with a friend.
Nowadays there’s pressure on everything that appears online. Everyone has to have a platform and a pitch and they need followers and marketing strategies and you have to pay attention to your open rate. And it’s not like these things weren’t around in the years of 2001 (when Blogger launched) - 2012 (when Medium launched and the era of blogging for blogging’s sake ended). It’s just that evvvvveryone and their mother wasn’t trying to start an online business. There was nobody saying we should be capitalizing on every ounce of wisdom we realized at the expense of our values.
I did a quick search on youtube for “blogging” just to see what was out there, and the entire first page was video after video of “10 things you NEED to do if you’re going to start a blog in 2024” and “How to start a blog and make money from day 1.” and “The best blog niches for 2024.”
Like, shouldn’t you already have at least a vague idea of what you’re going to share when you start your blog?!?!?!?!? What possible value could be provided when the entire basis of your blog is figuring out what “content” to post in the “niche” with the least competition? Who the fuck cares? Obviously not the person who’s thrust themselves into the hamster wheel with dollar signs in their eyeballs.
Which explains why almost every “content creator” is fundamentally selling the idea of money.
Listen, I know I’m not the first one to say this. It just blows my damn mind.
I digress. But it had to be said.
Now, I’m sure some of you out there are nostalgic for the basic ass blogs just as much as I am (say hi!!) But more prevalent are polished pieces with a (seemingly) predetermined message. Essays, ya know? I love a well-crafted message as much as I’m sure all of you do; it’s why I’m here instead of on instagram, which as we all know has fallen prey to the aforementioned “fuck your ethics to make a quick buck” model. But alas, I miss the casual attitude and easy, genuine connections I felt in the blogosphere. I also miss the word blogosphere.
Maybe I just haven’t found my people here on substack — that’s certainly not out of the question (okay, I definitely have found a handful of you - you know who you are). Or, and this is more likely, maybe it’s me who’s not open enough, and everyone else is getting along just fine. I see people’s networks of friends and wonder, “why am I not part of that?” I can’t remember a time I didn’t feel this way, actually.
It’s a blessing and a curse to be as invested in my work as I am. On one hand, I really know myself. I know my values, what I stand for, my passion, my skills…
On the other hand, it sometimes consumes me and I have trouble connecting. Maybe I’m a bit out of touch with the world beyond the dreams I spend most days obsessed with bringing into the world.
Maybe I’m on a precipice, about to break through and put my skills to the test.
That is, after all, the challenge I’ve been secretly craving.
Why my boyfriend is the best
I was talking to Luke about my struggles with organizing what I know into a teachable structure. The challenge with being self-taught is that I don’t have a “program” to teach from in the traditional sense. I’m not following the yoga studio’s sequence or the crossfit WOD (p.s why would you wanna do something called a wod? is it just me or is that word entirely unappealing?) or ya know… any set of arbitrary rules I bought from someone else.
There are no rules.
So while I do have some stellar templates, the program material I have is my own experience — all I’ve learned from living fully in my body and filtering information from a million different disciplines through my system. Which is exactly how it should be. Yeah. I didn’t wanna take the easy way. I refused time and time again. And now, here I am in the wild open. It’s exciting and terrifying.
In his typical, brilliantly infuriating yet utterly correct fashion, Luke said in response to my woes, “maybe you just need to get out there and teach a class.” Oh, the horror! You mean… do my work?
Vicious voices crept in. “You have nothing valuable to add to the conversation. You’re not good enough. Someone is already doing what you’re doing.”
Rationally, I know this isn’t true. I know 1. because of the conversations I’ve had on substack (look at me putting my foot in my mouth) and 2. because while I have seen people doing iterations of what I do… nobody else is me. And I’m not them. So there’s that.
My inner critic sometimes puts a chokehold on the part of me who yearns for connection, who yearns to share and expand and grow and to be part of a community, really. It tripped me up. But once I noticed I was spiraling, I went into my practice. Turned on some music, got into my body, moved the emotions. A few minutes and a wave of tears later I was smiling (and, bonus! kinda turned on). And I remembered — just keep taking one step at a time. That’s all there is to do. That’s all I can do. Experiment, refine my craft, build something I truly believe in. No quick fixes. Just good, challenging work.
What I’ve been watching
As a former climber chick, I still love a good climbing video. In this one, Alex Honnold (who ya’ll probably know from his famous free solo of El Cap) takes Magnus Midtbo free soloing in Red Rocks. I loved learning about their mindsets while climbing through thousands of feet of rock sans protection… plus they both seem like genuinely nice people.
As you may have gleaned from my most recent posts, I’m in the midst of rolling out some new movement classes and coaching… so I’m doing my research and learning from people whose approaches I respect.
The title of this video is a little misleading, as it’s not even remotely about the technical aspects of training, and to my delight, much more about the ethics of creating a business whose mission is to help people, first and foremost.
What I had for dinner
I make these when I want sweet for dinner but I still wanna get my protein in because, yes, I confess, I am fully a fitness freak.
Protein Pancakes
• 1 scoop of your fav protein powder (I use whey or whey + casein blend - not sure how vegan proteins fare)
• 1 ½ tablespoons chia seeds
• dash of honey/coconut sugar/truvia/sweetener of choice (depends how sweet your protein powder is - experiment to see whatcha like)
• ½ cup egg whites
• 2 tablespoons greek yogurt
• 1 tsp vanilla extract
Mix all ingredients together in a smallish bowl until well combined.
Heat a nonstick skillet over medium-high heat with a bit of butter/oil/cooking spray.
Pour half the batter into the pan and cook for 3-4 minutes, until it starts to bubble and the bottom is golden, then flip and cook another 2ish minutes until cooked through. Remove from the pan, add a lil more butter, and repeat with the rest of the batter.
I like to top these with (homemade!) salted ghee and chocolate chips and berries. But y’know… they’re pancakes. Do whatever the fuck you want with them.
Also, they reheat great in the toaster.
And that’s that!
Talk to ya soon
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Finally making my way through older, saved posts (I know, you’re way beyond this point now, already doing so many exciting things!). But I feel like I’m in this boat you speak of NOW - I’ve set myself up to teach a high school class on self-reflection and I’m not following any template or somebody else’s program, which is terrifying. But I’ll be putting all of ME into it (my interests in literature, spirituality, psychology + MY teaching style and philosophy + using Rick Rubin’s book as a regular resource and this other amazing book I found at “Five and Under” this summer - who knew that place was a treasure trove?!?!). My point in saying all this is, there are no rules, and that’s so fucking freeing, too. There is no ONE way to be/teach. Your projects are special precisely because they’re yours. I know I’m just preaching to the choir, but I’m also just pumping myself up after reading your post. I needed this!
Also, I don’t think I ever stopped blogging. My blogs were always philosophical sermons, even when I was 25.😂
There is nothing better than hearing somebody who has put the work in and can point directly to their experiences. Probably just the yearning of an aging person. Bottom line, I loved what you had to say here.