This essay is everything! Like I really want to talk about it with you, but don’t even know where to start.
“how do you know anything
but through this pulsing”
Feeling energy. Feeling consciousness. It’s so hard to articulate, yet you do it beautifully. It’s inherently sexual and pleasurable and freeing, but so much more than sex. It’s all about surrender. I feel it off and on, but have trouble sustaining it because I don’t often feel safe in my own skin. It’s been a work in progress. But if you have any quick and dirty tips for how to deepen one’s practice of surrendering, getting past the worldly tension and stiffness of post traumatic hypervigilance, I’d be so interested to know. I guess that’s a big ask!😂
Nida, thank you as always for your beautiful and kind words 💞!
What a question!! I know exactly where you're coming from... I could (and an planning to) teach a whole course on this. But a couple things come to mind that are pillars for me.
One is parts work (from internal family systems). So much of our chronic tension and post-traumatic hypervigilance stems from the younger parts of us that are frozen in time. So if we don't work with that, no matter how much other work we do, it kinda doesn't stick, at least in my experience. I've had mind-blowing shifts in my experience of surrender and presence through dialoging with and integrating parts. I really like the book "No Bad Parts" by Richard Schwartz as an entry point to that work, but there are also plenty of resources online.
The second is literally every day, even just for a few minutes, practicing pleasure in some way that is non-habitual. Things like sensual movement, self massage, dance, mirror work.
And finally emotional release through things like punching, shaking, sounding, breath work (like wim hof or holotropic breathwork - something more intense than usual breath).
What a great poem and a profound statement "the pathway to god is through the cervix."
Your work has far reaching healing potential ~ an antidote to the degenerated practices generally accepted as 'normal sexuality' (and veering towards sexual violence).
Thank you Veronika, I'm deeply touched by your words and attention.
You are so right about "normal" sexuality. What a topic that is... the performance, the denying & lack of awareness of the body's invitation. I'll have to write on that soon.
I feel so passionate about sharing the profound healing that's possible through softening, opening, trusting, surrendering logic to the body's process.
That's wonderful. I think this perspective is sorely needed in our culture. Most people are probably not even aware that there are any alternatives to what is considered 'normal sex'. And how much pain and trauma it continues to perpetuate....
One of my daughters has done a training in 'sexological bodywork' a couple of years ago. She's not a practitioner now, but she shared a lot during the training, and we learned so much from her. We are fortunate to be in a position as a family to be able to talk respectfully and honestly about this topic, which ~ despite all appearances ~ is still one of the greatest taboo subjects.
So, yes, I'm serious. I fully believe that this is one of the most important (and hardest) topics to write about, and not many people are qualified to do so. You are!
Oh wow, I know some people who are in the field of sexological bodywork - such profound work. And what a beautiful family dynamic. I don’t think most families share that kind of openness.
Thank you for your confidence Veronika. It means so much to me. I have lots brewing to make this work more available to those who want and need it. And judging by the response to this post… I’m feeling a lot of desire in the field.
I’ve been in the mountains without internet for a few days and the response is a bit overwhelming! Whew!
Thanks David, I'm glad you got something from this. Yes, there is a way of transcending sex though sex. A divine mystery to be revered, enjoyed, and cherished.
WOW. This is the very first piece of yours that I've read and it spoke to me....goosebumps!! 🔥SUBSCRIBED!! I so look forward to reading more and learning from you, sister!
Faye! This is my first time commenting and I'm feeling so much after reading your piece.
My beautiful cervix has been operated on twice (the last time two years ago) and I suspect that there is some healing to do in our relationship. Instead of softening, there was guarding.
When I had my six month follow up, the OB said he could wouldn't know it wasn't fully intact if he hadn't been the one to operate.
I've heard of these elusive cervical orgasms. How does one begin to explore this area of the body?
Hi Sarah! Thank you so much for joining and sharing in this space, and apologies for my delay in answering. I just returned from a trip with less than stellar internet connection.
I feel so much compassion for where you are right now, and am sending you big warm hugs. I deeply relate with your experience; I also had my cervix operated on several years ago, and there was a lot of healing and reconnecting to do. I remember feeling so much fear and grief around my ability to feel sensation, and yes, lots of guarding, too.
For me, exploring has been a process of dearmouring with a daily devotional pleasure practice and intentionally connecting with the energy of pussy and cervix. Just feeling, loving, acknowledging what is, and moving deeper into my body. I cannot say there is any sort of linear method, but rather a continual softening, opening, surrendering into trust of my body's process and timing. The most technical piece is breathing, breathing, breathing, and specifically directing breath to the cervix. Opening with the breath when fear or resistance show up.
I hope this helps! Thank you so much for sharing your question.
Faye! Thank you for your loving response! I receive your words and encouragement with open arms.
Thank you for the kind reminders about dearmouring and daily pleasure practice: these are in my toolkit and is a wonderful reminder to receive of this medicine. As I breathe into my cervix, I can feel the terror trapped in my cells. I'm holding myself with lots of tenderness as I meet these sensations and memories.
This makes so much sense. Body processes are never linear. No one person's process will look exactly the same as another, since all of our experiences are so unique.
Thank you for your kind tending! I appreciate you!
This essay is everything! Like I really want to talk about it with you, but don’t even know where to start.
“how do you know anything
but through this pulsing”
Feeling energy. Feeling consciousness. It’s so hard to articulate, yet you do it beautifully. It’s inherently sexual and pleasurable and freeing, but so much more than sex. It’s all about surrender. I feel it off and on, but have trouble sustaining it because I don’t often feel safe in my own skin. It’s been a work in progress. But if you have any quick and dirty tips for how to deepen one’s practice of surrendering, getting past the worldly tension and stiffness of post traumatic hypervigilance, I’d be so interested to know. I guess that’s a big ask!😂
Nida, thank you as always for your beautiful and kind words 💞!
What a question!! I know exactly where you're coming from... I could (and an planning to) teach a whole course on this. But a couple things come to mind that are pillars for me.
One is parts work (from internal family systems). So much of our chronic tension and post-traumatic hypervigilance stems from the younger parts of us that are frozen in time. So if we don't work with that, no matter how much other work we do, it kinda doesn't stick, at least in my experience. I've had mind-blowing shifts in my experience of surrender and presence through dialoging with and integrating parts. I really like the book "No Bad Parts" by Richard Schwartz as an entry point to that work, but there are also plenty of resources online.
The second is literally every day, even just for a few minutes, practicing pleasure in some way that is non-habitual. Things like sensual movement, self massage, dance, mirror work.
And finally emotional release through things like punching, shaking, sounding, breath work (like wim hof or holotropic breathwork - something more intense than usual breath).
What a great poem and a profound statement "the pathway to god is through the cervix."
Your work has far reaching healing potential ~ an antidote to the degenerated practices generally accepted as 'normal sexuality' (and veering towards sexual violence).
Thank you Veronika, I'm deeply touched by your words and attention.
You are so right about "normal" sexuality. What a topic that is... the performance, the denying & lack of awareness of the body's invitation. I'll have to write on that soon.
I feel so passionate about sharing the profound healing that's possible through softening, opening, trusting, surrendering logic to the body's process.
That's wonderful. I think this perspective is sorely needed in our culture. Most people are probably not even aware that there are any alternatives to what is considered 'normal sex'. And how much pain and trauma it continues to perpetuate....
One of my daughters has done a training in 'sexological bodywork' a couple of years ago. She's not a practitioner now, but she shared a lot during the training, and we learned so much from her. We are fortunate to be in a position as a family to be able to talk respectfully and honestly about this topic, which ~ despite all appearances ~ is still one of the greatest taboo subjects.
So, yes, I'm serious. I fully believe that this is one of the most important (and hardest) topics to write about, and not many people are qualified to do so. You are!
Oh wow, I know some people who are in the field of sexological bodywork - such profound work. And what a beautiful family dynamic. I don’t think most families share that kind of openness.
Thank you for your confidence Veronika. It means so much to me. I have lots brewing to make this work more available to those who want and need it. And judging by the response to this post… I’m feeling a lot of desire in the field.
I’ve been in the mountains without internet for a few days and the response is a bit overwhelming! Whew!
Release that resistance!! 💕
It's the game of all games!
“If you want to find the secrets of the universe, think in terms of energy, frequency and vibration.” — Nikola Tesla
This essay would give to us hours on deep conversation
💕
It is all about it
two approaches to kundalini energy weakening in my life
scary ?
Yes
pure and exponentiated sexual energy
I'm sure we'd have the most beautiful conversations Berkana. I'm grateful to have you and your energy in this space 🍯💞
Sex is intimacy of the rawest sort... there's always an irreplicable value in giving that to a lover.
Mmmm yes, the gift of connection, what could be richer?
Beautiful! Yes, the universe wants to create, and wants to experience ecstasy, and it does so via our bodies.
Thank you Mike! :) I knew you'd feel this one. Oh the wonders of the cosmic stream
Beautiful. As a man, it’s intriguing to hear a woman’s perspective on sex and sexual energy. It really is something divine beyond just sex.
Thanks David, I'm glad you got something from this. Yes, there is a way of transcending sex though sex. A divine mystery to be revered, enjoyed, and cherished.
Thank you for this, Faye.
My pleasure, Aleksandra. I'm so glad it reached you.
This is phenomenal and so important. Your words always take me to new places 🌹
I'm so glad it took you on a journey, Jennae. That's my greatest desire in writing. Thank you thank you thank you for sharing your reflection 💞🪞🍯
WOW. This is the very first piece of yours that I've read and it spoke to me....goosebumps!! 🔥SUBSCRIBED!! I so look forward to reading more and learning from you, sister!
Jacqueline!!! I'm so glad it found you ❤️🔥 and grateful to have you as part of this community. Mmmmmm feeling the goosebumps myself!!!
Faye! This is my first time commenting and I'm feeling so much after reading your piece.
My beautiful cervix has been operated on twice (the last time two years ago) and I suspect that there is some healing to do in our relationship. Instead of softening, there was guarding.
When I had my six month follow up, the OB said he could wouldn't know it wasn't fully intact if he hadn't been the one to operate.
I've heard of these elusive cervical orgasms. How does one begin to explore this area of the body?
Hi Sarah! Thank you so much for joining and sharing in this space, and apologies for my delay in answering. I just returned from a trip with less than stellar internet connection.
I feel so much compassion for where you are right now, and am sending you big warm hugs. I deeply relate with your experience; I also had my cervix operated on several years ago, and there was a lot of healing and reconnecting to do. I remember feeling so much fear and grief around my ability to feel sensation, and yes, lots of guarding, too.
For me, exploring has been a process of dearmouring with a daily devotional pleasure practice and intentionally connecting with the energy of pussy and cervix. Just feeling, loving, acknowledging what is, and moving deeper into my body. I cannot say there is any sort of linear method, but rather a continual softening, opening, surrendering into trust of my body's process and timing. The most technical piece is breathing, breathing, breathing, and specifically directing breath to the cervix. Opening with the breath when fear or resistance show up.
I hope this helps! Thank you so much for sharing your question.
xx
Faye! Thank you for your loving response! I receive your words and encouragement with open arms.
Thank you for the kind reminders about dearmouring and daily pleasure practice: these are in my toolkit and is a wonderful reminder to receive of this medicine. As I breathe into my cervix, I can feel the terror trapped in my cells. I'm holding myself with lots of tenderness as I meet these sensations and memories.
This makes so much sense. Body processes are never linear. No one person's process will look exactly the same as another, since all of our experiences are so unique.
Thank you for your kind tending! I appreciate you!
xx